Moving Mountains

The pastor at Newport church gave a really great, inspirational message this last sunday. He talked about how the first thing God said to Adam and Eve was "be fruitful and multiply" and how that stands true today, and is relevant in our lives. People wonder why bad things happen. A lot of the time when someone who doesn't believe in God talks to me about the possibility of there being a God, the first thing they ask is "if there is a God, why does he let such horrible things happen?". Bad things happen because this world is not what God intended for us. We desired free will, and we received it. God's will for each and every one of us is to be fruitful- live well, succeed, and be happy. And to multiply- grow and spread that fruitfulness. Sometimes we spiritualize things to try to rationalize it, you'll hear people say "maybe it's God's will that I be poor" or "maybe it's God's will that I have this sickness". It's not! We shouldn't settle for that because it's not God's intention that we do. People today seem to bless things that should be cursed and curse things that should be blessed. We should not accept things that ought not to be. What is to be cursed we need to push out of our lives, and what needs to be blessed we need to hold close. We should be fruitful, expect greatness, and declare it! We can move mountains if we are fruitful.

I guess people can't read my eyes

I wish I could take more risks. live more in the moment. say what's on my mind. have no regrets.

In some ways I am a person who takes chances, and lives in the moment when it comes to new experiences, dreams and aspirations, but when it comes to my heart... not so much. I find that most of the time I don't tell someone what I want to tell them, or put myself out there in fear of what might happen. But I think that's silly. Everyday I learn more and more that taking the chance with the possibility of it not turning out as I hoped is much more worth it than the wondering of what would have happened. Or the dreams that remind me of my never ending curiosity.

I'm Revived

"I'm Revived"

You and I collide, when I open my eyes
You give me the breath of life, now I’m revived

My undertaker and a miracle maker
Who speaks from the skies
Take these tears from my eyes
This generation will rise

You and I collide, when I open my eyes
You give me the breath of life, now I’m revived
Yes I’m revived

Every season you are near
Constantly whispering for me to hear
Your love is unbreakable
Let your spirit take a hold on me

Father you and I collide
Open my eyes
I want to see

Too Much On The Brain

Man I still don't know what I'm going to do this summer. There's a bunch of factors that I'm waiting on to determine if I'll be in California all of summer or only part of summer...

1. Housing: if my roomates and I have a place by the end of May, when school gets out, then it's all good, but if not.. then the question of where I'd stay comes into play..

2. Part time job: if I'll be able to get a job to pay for food and gas. If I don't have a place in Orange by my school, then I would maybe stay with my friend in Redondo Beach so I'd have to know kinda soon where I'd be staying in order to lock down a summer job in the right area.

3. I want to see my family: Being out of state already means I don't see my family that often. I'm so close with my family that it's hard to not see them on a daily basis already, but it would be even harder for me to not even get to see them during the time I usually get to... and I feel like I get refreshed going back to Washington. It's good for my soul in a way.

4. How many auditions I'd be going on this summer: if there's a lot of auditions then it would make sense for me to be in California. But if there's only a few here and there then it would make more sense to spend the summer in Washington.

I'm hoping I'll get more clarity soon.

Cardboard Testimonies

This past Easter Sunday I went to church, Bethany Baptist, with my family and got to see the best service (in my opinion) our church has ever had! Our pastor passed out these cardboard testimony response cards to everyone in church.. on the front it says "What I was before Christ" then on the back it says "What I am now in Christ". He asked us to write our own response, just a word or sentence that answered the question. But then he said some of us from church wanted to share their testimonies. First, our pastor held up his sign, then one or two other people at a time would walk to the front of the stage and hold up their signs, then flip it to the other side. So many people came out to hold up their signs, it was beautiful to see how willing people were to open up and what had happened to people in my church that I see all the time but don't know anything about. The fifth person to walk out onto the stage was a middle aged woman. She held up her sign- on the front (what I was before Christ) said "daughter committed suicide" then she flipped it over and it said "found the comfort and healing of Jesus Christ" (what I am now in Christ). I started balling my eyes out of course, but I realized everyone else in church was crying too. There were so many people- lonely, falsely taught, miscarriage, broken relationships, deaths, lost and confused. All of them healed and renewed by Christ. It was inspiring! The coolest thing is that this wasn't some epic scene in a movie...this is real, and right in front of us. This is what makes me have a passion for people, the stories they have to tell. Getting to know people and what's in their hearts.

I think in church it's important to have some services like this every once in awhile. When people can connect and relate with each other it brings the entire church much closer.