Dad Does Boy Talk

So I used to never talk to my dad about "boy stuff" until my freshmen year of college and ever since that door was opened he continually asks about my love life. It still feels slightly odd to talk about boys with him because growing up we never did that. But it's fun having a dad's input. My dad finds it so odd that nowadays guys aren't asking girls out on actual dates. I told him how today its either people going to parties and just hooking up or relationships develop out of hanging out in groups or developing some kind of friendship then getting into a relationship. At least at our age, I think after college people tend to go out on dates more. He gets it but still thinks it's odd cause he remembers a time when a guy would go after a girl with clear intentions. No dilly dallying. Ha. I have mixed feelings about the dating world, part of me doesn't like the idea because of the inevitable awkward situations, but then again it would make mixed signals disappear. With friendships/acquaintances there's this whole "game" of what do certain signals mean, hidden messages, and uncertainty. The whole "He's Just Not That Into You" scenario. Gosh freshmen year of college I was asked out left and right and would always be so picky and not really give guys a chance, then when I did agree to a date I was inexperienced and naive leading to me getting in way over my head. But you definitely learn.

My dad is so funny. When I'm with someone he's very critical and protective but when I'm not with somebody he tries to encourage me to give guys a shot by being open to going on dates or setting me up with guys and planning my next relationship for me. haha. And he tells me what kinda guy he thinks I need to be with. He believes you should be with someone who appreciates your interests/passions but has different passions than you. That you shouldn't go for someone in the same "pool" as you. So is the statement that opposites attract true? I don't know if it stands true when considering extremes, but now I'm starting to see the truth in it. In my dad's opinion he would put me with a "guy's guy" who's very smart, witty, and a high powered business man or doctor. I'm not necessarily looking for that exact fit, because that would be a stretch from what I lean towards- the passionate, artsy, funny, and sensitive type. It's important to have similarities in interests and personality traits, but there needs to be a balance of opposite interests/personality traits so that those two people compliment each other.

Well done daddy with the "boy talk".

All The World's A Stage, And All The Men And Women Merely Players

I wish life could be a musical where if you're feeling overwhelmed with thoughts or emotions you could burst out into song and dance as if it's completely normal. Sometimes when I'm walking to class I have to stop myself from singing out loud to the song on my ipod or from saying the inner monologue of thoughts going on inside my head out loud. I'm the kind of person who bottles up the majority of what I'm feeling so at times it'll catch up with me and I'll feel a bit overwhelmed. And at those times it's hard to express everything I'm feeling when someone asks me how I'm feeling, I can see how the characters in musicals find a release through putting their words into song. It seems easier than just explaining your feelings in conversation. Plus it's just more fun.

You Would Not Believe Your Eyes

Space is breathtaking. My second choice of career, if I could have any career I wanted, it would be to study space.

Gumption, tons of it

For those of us who are in our 20's this time in our lives is crucial, exhausting, exciting, and can determine our futures. And not only can it determine what we'll do with our lives, but it is when we discover who we truly are. I've discovered a lot about myself over the past two years from little things to the big things. I am proud of the woman I am and have yet to become. Part of our lives right now is having fun, experiencing things, relationships, finding our passions and going after them, and the other part is learning to take care of ourselves, preparing for the start of our careers, and discovering who we want to spend our lives with. It's all quite overwhelming, but mostly in a good way. This wednesday in my film class two of the writers from the show The Simpsons came to speak to our class. It was amazing seeing all they had done and hearing about how they thought it'd be impossible to go into the field they thought was so unattainable. Basically what they were telling us is to get out there and get whatever experience you can, life experience is valuable for any pathway you end up taking, and you never know what you can accomplish till you say what the hell and leap for it! I have people constantly asking me "what are you going to do with your life?", "what career?", "are you worried about being successful?" and much more, but you know, no one has the answers and knows exactly where they'll end up. Dreams and goals are so important to have, but a dream can lead to another dream then to another. So i'll just keep dreaming, chasing, and see where I end up. I have faith that I'm being watched over and will end up exactly where I'm supposed to be.

Life, it's ever so strange
It's so full of change
Think that you've worked it out
Then BANG
Right out of the blue
Something happens to you
To throw you off course
And then you

Breakdown
Yeah you breakdown
Well don't you breakdown
Listen to me
Because

It's just a ride, it's just a ride
No need to run, no need to hide
It'll take you round and round
Sometimes you're up
Sometimes you're down
It's just a ride, it's just a ride
Don't be scared
Don't hide your eyes
It may feel so real inside
But don't forget it's just a ride

Truth, we don't wanna hear
It's too much to take
Don't like to feel out of control
So we make our plans
Ten times a day
And when they don't go
Our way we

Breakdown
Yeah we breakdown
Well don't you breakdown
Listen to me
Because

It's just a ride, it's just a ride
No need to run, no need to hide
It'll take you round and round
Sometimes you're up
Sometimes you're down
It's just a ride, it's just a ride
Don't be scared
Don't hide your eyes
It may feel so real inside
But don't forget it's just a ride

Slowly, oh so very slowly
Accept that
There's no getting off
So live it, just gotta go with it
Coz this ride's, never gonna stop

-Jem

Undress My Mind

Fall is officially my favorite season

My weekend home was a wonderful get away. And I got the real authentic fall experience- pouring rain, fall leaves, crisp chilly air, pumpkin patch, lattes, and a warm fire burning in the morning. I had to study for midterms while I was home but that was fine. It was cozy. I still haven't decided exactly what I want to dress up as for Halloween.. :/

Drip Drip Drop

I basically stayed inside all day studying for my midterm I have tomorrow. Brittany and I went to a costume store to look for Halloween costumes, I still don't know what exactly I want to be and its kind of stressing me out. My sister thinks I'm funny for getting stressed about it, but I love Halloween so I like to know what I want to dress up as so I can do it up right! And I still don't know where I'm going to spend my Halloween, I have a few options... I just need to choose. But my roommates and I are going to pass out candy to kids who come to our house early on in the evening. That should be fun.

It rained all day today so I went out and took a picture of the droplets left behind on a clover. And as my new thing I did today- I started writing a song. I've always wanted to start writing music as a hobby. This weekend I'm going home, so I hope I can put some music to the lyrics while I have access to my mom's guitar. It's a silly song, a nice pick me up from studying. I'll post the song on here this weekend :)

Raindrops

Ugh midterms... my days consist of studying. coffee. naps.

But today was fun, it was rainy and cold. It felt nice to wear cozy clothes, drink hot coffee, listen to raindrops. And it's so funny how people in California get all riled up when it rains because it's rare. Some people get pissed, some get excited, and some don't know how to drive when it rains. haha. I get excited because it reminds me of home.

So today I decided that I want to do something I've never done before each day even if it's really insignificant to make my day not feel wasted or unmemorable. And I want to take a picture each day of something I find beautiful, something that conveys how I'm feeling, or just something I find interesting. I love taking pictures so this will be really fun for me and I'll post them on this blog each day. I think I got the idea to do this because I watched an episode from "Friends" where they all are making New Years resolutions. But I usually don't make New Years resolutions because I know most of the time they fall through right away, so maybe there's a better chance of me going through with this since it's not just because it's the start of a new year.

Tonight was my first night making pancakes, and not just pancakes but chocolate chip banana pancakes. It was tricky at times, but a few of them turned out well. And actually very yummy. It's a step closer to learning to cook different food. I can make enchiladas, egg omelettes, now pancakes, and much much more to come!!

My dark side

I've been having the biggest urge to change my hair... I want to try dark dark brown for a change. I love my blonde hair and will keep that as my main look, but I want to try something new, and I think because it's the Fall I want to go darker. If I didn't have to keep my hair the same for acting I'd do it right NOW! Maybe I will if acting isn't going anywhere, that's how I'll celebrate. haha.

Emma Watson

Kristen Stewart

Lights Will Guide You Home

I've been thinking about where I'm going to end up after graduation lately. Considering its my junior year, it's getting closer. I came to California for college for a few different reasons- simply to live somewhere new, to revisit somewhere I loved growing up, to pursue acting while in college, and if I decided I wanted to work in film this would be the place to make connections. I've loved living in Orange while going to college it's such an amazing little nook with endless charm and Chapman is a beautiful school with great classes and funny professors. I've been pursuing acting since I got here and I've actually managed to make my way a bit by running around town, getting headshots, doing showcases, lunches with agents, etc. Now I have an agent that I like and am starting to do auditions which is fun, but not my life. As far as considering a career in film, I'm minoring in film studies so I'm constantly learning more and more about film and next summer I hope to intern at some film production company such as Paramount or Warners Bros. If not that, then maybe some marketing company or fashion magazine in LA. Ha... or even Disney Corporate.

I've kinda always thought that if I don't go into something relating to film then I'd go back to Washington after college. Because every other career path is available there and my family is there. But also because I've grown to love it there, I always used to think that I was a California girl at heart because I missed living here, but somewhere along the way I was converted to a Northwest girl. I love the smell of rain, the seasons, the culture, the people, the nature. Although palm trees, sunshine, sand, Disneyland and fancy LA spots are fun, it doesn't quite compare. But I could see myself happy either in CA or WA. I guess we'll see what happens, what God has in store. Oh but then there's also this other part of me that would love to move around while I'm young- live in NYC, Hawaii, abroad even. But that doesn't seem realistic unless it comes with a job opportunity, so my adventurous urges will have to be left for vacations.

I belong in the wild... (pictures from our trip to Forks, WA last Winter Break haha).

Into the light of the dark black night

My favorite parts of October...

Waking up to morning fog.

Apple Cider.

Huge scarves.

Pumpkins.

Fall leaves. When you walk around they crunch under your feet.
Halloween- trick or treaters, haunted houses, scary movies, candy, cobwebs, costumes
Disneyland at Halloween time. The haunted mansion, and now ghost galaxy at space mountain.
So I've started this thing were I put up sticky notes on my wall with quotes that I like or that are inspirational in a way. These are the ones I have up so far:

"Always do what you're afraid to do" -Ralph Waldo Emerson

" A day without laughter is a day wasted" -Charlie Chaplin

" What are men to rocks and mountains" -Jane Austen

" For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline" - 2 Timothy 1:7

Any suggestions??